There are so many things I love to hear as a mom. It’s amazing when you hear your child tell you that they love you, the contagious laughter of your toddler, or all your kids playing quietly together in the next room. But on the flip side, there are also those things that a mom NEVER wants to hear. These are the sounds that strike fear in every mother’s heart, send you into a state of panic, or bring you to the brink of insanity. Something bad usually happens when you hear these things.

The sound of your child whimpering and saying “my tummy hurts”. In a panic I say, “do you have to poop, are you hungry, are you gassy, are you nervous?” Anything but the stomach flu. Anything. Please.

The sound of your bedroom door opening at 4:00 a.m. Mommy, can I get up now? Noooooooooo! Go back to bed. It’s even worse if they are coughing, sniffling, or whimpering when they come in. Sick kids…ugh.

The sound of your child dragging a chair across your wood floor.
If they are not supposed to have it, that’s when you hear the chair. Usually just when you sit down for the first time that night. Then you hear the slide…turn around and find them standing on the counter grabbing for scissors or knives.

Being startled awake by the sound of your dog yakking and/or dry heaving. Nothing gets you out of bed faster than a puking dog at 2:00 a.m. If it is not the kids, it’s the damn dog.

“Mommmmmmmmmm! Where are you?” I hate this pretty much any time, but especially just as you close the door to go to the bathroom. They know. They have a radar to know when you are in another room and unavailable. They WILL find you.

A loud crash. RUN! Nothing gets your butt off the couch like the ear piercing crash followed by silence…or screaming. Both are terrifying.

The splashing sound of any liquid. Could be pee, water, milk, OJ, toilet water…Surprise! It is never a good thing.

Silence. Although at first you may think it is heavenly…Silence is NOT GOLDEN when you have young kids. If it is quiet, something is going down. Most likely something bad.

It’s ok…I’ll fix it.
What are you going to fix? Why does something need fixing? What did you break? I’m 99.9% sure you won’t fix it.

Ugh….the feelings. I’m annoyed, terrified, and stressed just writing this.