Hello? Can you hear me? Hey, guys? These are questions I find myself asking my kids far too often. Let me explain it like this…Have you ever had that reoccurring bad dream where something terrible is about to happen and you start to scream, but when you open your mouth to yell, no sound comes out? Yeah…that is how I feel every single day as I struggle to communicate with my very own children.

I am pretty sure that I am alive (though sometimes it barely feels like it). My voice seems to be working, at least other people seem to be able to hear and communicate with me, yet I don’t think my kids can hear a word that comes out of my mouth. I am not sure if it is selective hearing, blatant disobedience, undiagnosed hearing issues, or simply not caring, but my three little angels have a hell of a time listening to me, and most of the time even acknowledging my presence.

Because of this, I find myself saying the same things over and over again day after day. In fact, I can pretty much sum up my life in these 14 simple phrases.

  1. Put on your shoes.
  2. What do you want…WHAT DO YOU WANT?!
  3. Put on your shoes.
  4. Hurry up, we are late.
  5. Shhhhhhhh.
  6. For the love of God, just let me sleep.
  7. Put on your shoes.
  8. I have no idea what you are talking about. Literally, no idea. (staring blankly)
  9. You can do it!
  10. It’s OK.
  11. Don’t you ever do that again. Ever.
  12. I mean it.
  13. PUT ON YOUR DAMN SHOES!

And the most important thing I will gladly say a million times a day…I love you!

Now put on your damn shoes!

Life Love and Dirty Dishes